Is your prayer time actually "sit and worry" time?

If you are fortunate enough to be able to make time each day for prayer (I know, it can be a challenge, but you really should), you may fall into a trap that I found myself in this morning: instead of using it to joyfully, faithfully speak with God, you actually use it as a time to sit and stew in your worries. Prayer, to begin with, should look much like gratitude (here’s an article I wrote about it: Gratitude is a Prayer.) Even prayer that is just all asking for things, without the worry, misses the mark just a bit. But using the whole time to worry? Get behind me, Satan!

Here’s what I mean: those of us who are doers may tend to, unintentionally, measure our prayer by how much we “get” out of it. Did I pray long enough, hard enough? Did I name every little intention? Did it “feel” like prayer? And from there flows a sort of vanity about prayer: I prayed for my children, so I’ve “done” something, and God will hear. I sat here for a good long while! So it must count. Good for me.

Worrying is similar. Why do we worry? Does it, as Jesus asked, add a minute to our lives? No, and probably the stress lessens the length of our lives. But it does make us feel like we’re doing something. Worry-as-prayer gives a sense of control, as all worry does. As long as I sit and think and worry, at least I’m addressing it…

Don’t give in to that temptation. The harder and more radical thing is to truly believe God is near, he hears your prayers, and that He is in control. It is much harder to give it all back to Him. Prayer time is so special: just you and your Creator, in a loving embrace, with the Holy Spirit facilitating the whole thing. I was taught during the 19th annotation that you begin your prayer by saying something along the lines of, “I believe you are here, Lord,” as you start the prayer time. Then you can much easily get into that receptive frame of mind; that thine will be done, not mine, mode. To believe that it is God who answers prayers, not that we change things by sheer will of our mind and worry. It may take time to turn things over to God that way - it’s kind of the work of a lifetime - but as in all things, you can ask for God’s grace to do so. Ask Mary, too, because she is a powerful intercessor, and sort of the OG “thine will be done” expert.

This week, I will be joining Morning Air on Relevant Radio to talk about saints that all dads need! I’ve also got an article coming out on Catholic Stand about that, Monday. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads - you have an important job. You can catch my interview this Thursday at 8:30 am eastern/7:30 central. Find where you can listen here.

How to raise good children

As long-time readers and listeners know, I became a mom last year. In addition to obsessing over what’s for dinner (everyone has to eat, every night, it never ends) I now obsess over how to raise my child. Not things like what sports he’ll play or how much TV to allow, but over what his soul and character will be. 21st century parents have the unique and awful challenge of raising children such that they are protected from the usual temptations to arrogance, pride, gluttony, and what-have-you, but also to protect them from far more nefarious things: form them virtuously so they know better than to do things like casually take the sort of accidentally life-ending fentanyl type drugs that float around schools now; to be emotionally strong enough that if a classmate successfully attempts suicide, they know not to not do the same thing; to not get addicted to online pornography, or be drafted into a self-mutilating gender cult. If you read the last sentence to someone 50 years ago it would be nonsense. So, these are hyper-challenging times, but we know that God does not leave us without resources, and we simply have to be creative, and dependent on Him in all things.

Well, it occurs to me that the first place to begin is not with our children, but - with ourselves! If I want my son to understand the crucial importance of real relationships, and not a life lived entirely online, oughtn’t I to demonstrate that by having relationships in my own life? If I want him to have a prayer life, shouldn’t I demonstrate that, and indeed, teach him to pray? If I want him to get outside and not spend all his time with a screen, am I modeling an active life myself? If I want him to have hobbies and show an interest in the world around us, do I have hobbies? What can I personally do to model gratitude, respect, and most of all, resiliency? It’s not just about avoiding hypocrisy, but about actively pursuing truth. What is true about life and the human condition? What is true about sin and the things that cause us unhappiness? It seems to me a parent’s job is essentially to teach their children how to exist in this world, how to be human, and to do so joyfully with trust in God. if the child does not see the parent inhabiting that, well, good luck, eh? So, I and all parents have our work cut out for us. But again, God gives us the resources, we need only ask.

One item that is a must for all families in this time is the St. Michael Prayer. Begin to pray it together as a family. We say it as part of our tucking-in bedtime routine, and by the time he can talk, our son will have it memorized. But St. Michael is the antidote for the evil - and it is evil - that exists in our world. But, never fear - “In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.”

Keeping faith during summer travels

Yesterday I had the pleasure of joining the Morning Air program once again, to discuss how to keep your faith the focus when you’re traveling for summer vacations. You can listen to that here, starting at about 17:53. All the advice applies for any type of travel, any time of year, of course. That advice is: first, plan. Know where the churches are and when the Mass times are before you even go, and make a plan - with your family! - to go. Also, wake up just a couple minutes early to get your prayer time in, or utilize your environment to make it that much more meaningful. Dawn beach prayer, anyone? And, bring holy objects with you: a mini crucifix, an image of your favorite saint, whatever it is, and put it where you can see it, like your hotel bedside table, beside the tv, taped to the bathroom mirror, or on your dashboard. The image will remind you of the truth, of who you are, what you believe, and that even far away from home, God is still #1! Happy summer travels, all!