It is already the 6th Sunday of Easter.
Fr. John Langlois, OP, writes a reflection each Sunday that goes out over the Dominicans’ listserv. You can see the full text of today’s reflection/sermon here. It is about how over the course of Easter, the readings move from a focus on the physical acts after the Resurrection of Jesus, to the manner in which God’s spirit dwells in all of us as a result.
Here is the part that got me: Fr. Langlois asks, “…we can wonder to ourselves if this new life within us is for real. It can be difficult at times to believe that Christ is alive in us, and that the Holy Spirit is at work in our life. In fact, we seem to be repeatedly confronted with evidence to the contrary. If this indwelling of God within us is for real, then why do we still struggle with sinful desires? Why do we continue to sin, or seem unable to grow in virtue?”
I just counted it up, and I am about to enter week 10 of quarantine. That’s 68 days, as of today. Sadly, it has not felt much like Easter (though I know, Easter is not a feeling) and I do think the longer I spend away from the sacraments and the ability to attend church, the easier it is to despair. I am reminded that despair is a sin.
Fr. Langlois responds with this:
Well, first of all, it’s true that the point of God’s dwelling within us is to make us holy, to transform us more and more into his likeness from within. But it’s also true that this is a work he brings about over the course of time, and is largely hidden from our eyes. And actually, one of the signs of his presence within is our deeper perception and awareness of the extent of our sinfulness. It is precisely because of his presence and work within us that our minds and hearts are enlightened to see sinful habits that we didn’t see before! That’s why it often seems like we’re regressing. And this also explains how many of the great saints rightly thought of themselves as great sinners, because the more God dwells in us, the more we see how imperfect and un-holy we are! This deeper awareness of our sinfulness is a sign of progress, not regression.
“Largely hidden from our eyes,” and, “That’s why it often seems like we are regressing.”
This week I led a (virtual) book discussion on Fr. Jacques Phillipe’s Interior Freedom. It is a small book, but every sentence contains a universe of meaning worth re-reading and exploring. A point he makes is that our desire to know why God works the way He does is an indication of not only a lack of trust, but an indication of a desire for power. Now if you know me, you know I like to understand the why, so the times in life when I don’t - and they are many! More often than not! - I am frustrated. I find the only way to any sense of peace is to lift these instances up to God, instead (which usually looks ungraciously like, “Fine, God, have it your way.” And then, “Okay, enough time has passed. How about now, God?”).
So I like Fr. Langlois’s point, that much of what God does for and in us is hidden. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist; that doesn’t mean it isn’t real. As he says, it takes place “over the course of time.” Perhaps I will never see or understand it.
So, he says, God dwells within us. God dwells within us, even still, and He is among us, even still. This “season”, as our evangelical brethren say, is no doubt one of the hardest many of us will endure in our lifetimes. And in the darkness that exists, perhaps it is easier for sin to enter in, or simply it is easier for us to see. The thing to remember, and what I took away from this reflection, is that it does not mean God is any less present. I may have to try extra hard to believe Christ dwells within me, but it doesn’t make it any less true than at any other time in my life, whether I can see, believe and understand it, or now.
He ends with: “The more we believe in Christ’s indwelling and allow him to live his life in us, the more we will experience the new life he offers us here and now.”
