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"For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them." Matthew 18:20

 

Latest article: Why All Good Leaders Prayer

Laura DeMaria

Hey folks! Prayer and leadership are closely aligned to me, so I wrote about it for Catholic Stand. The article is called “Prayer is Critical to Being a Good Leader.”

In the article, I outline the reasons why prayer is a critical tool for those leading others. It grounds you in humility and gratitude (hopefully), gives you the opportunity to prayer for those you are leading/serving and perhaps more closely consider their needs or perspective, it gives room to be centered and make less hasty decisions, and all kinds of other good stuff.

Click the link above, and it is also copy/pasted below. I hope you are having a fabulous Labor Day weekend.

Prayer is Critical to Being a Good Leader

Abraham Lincoln said, “I have been driven many times upon my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient for that day.”

These wise words from one of America’s most tested political leaders capture how critical prayer is in the life of any leader.  Whether you are running a huge, multi-national corporation, or just a small household, achieving a deep prayer life cultivates virtue and aids in decision-making.

The fruits of prayer for leaders

Setting aside time every day to speak with Jesus, Mary, and the saints cultivates both self-awareness and practical virtues like humility, wisdom and gratitude.

For example, the contemplative, Ignatian style of prayer that involves an examination of conscience and a colloquy with God can result in deep self-knowledge. In my own experience of simultaneously self-searching and engaging in conversational forms of prayer with God, my own motivations and inclinations are uncovered. Why did a comment bother me? Why am I really making this decision? What fears are holding me back? Once honest answers to such questions come to light, I can then ask God for His help.

For those in leadership, the ability to develop and maintain self-awareness of one’s motivations is critical.  Jesus is always ready to meet us in prayer, and He provides the grace we need to grow in personal excellence, and in turn, to lead others authentically.

Discerning God’s Will

Taking the time to sit in stillness with God also provides the opportunity to hear His voice and discern His will in all things.  Leaders are often high-stakes decision-makers who face pressure from others to act quickly. Instead of responding to that pressure, the habit of engaging with God in prayer sets the foundation for more thoughtful decision-making in line with God’s will as opposed to the world’s will. It helps a leader to be centered enough to hear God’s voice, rather than seeking the quick or easy way out.

This centering also creates a sense of stability for the leader’s team. Team members often look to the leader as a being a rock, not easily moved in the heat of the moment. Possessing a deep interior prayer life instills a sense of certainty and peace that will pervade all aspects of such a leader’s life.

Prayer also teaches us how to forgive. A prayer life focused on a deep and true understanding of God’s mercy for us, His children, means we are better able to show that mercy to others. It also teaches us gratitude for all we have and humility as we recognize our own shortcomings.

The best prayers for leaders

What are the best prayers for leaders? Here are few that have personally enhanced both my spiritual and leadership journeys. These prayers caution against pride while calling us to higher ideals than power and fame.

The first is the Suscipe prayer of St. Ignatius. “Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty…everything is yours, do with it what you will.” This is critical for a leader to understand: the power, the honor and wealth the leader enjoys – in other words, the perks that may come along with leadership – are temporary. Nothing you or I have is ours; it all belongs to God. If we can internalize this, our daily challenges become much easier.

Similarly, the Litany of Humility is a powerful prayer. “From the desire to be esteemed, loved, honored and praised, deliver me, O Jesus.” Be careful, though!  It’s fairly well known that those who ask for humility quickly receive it through one humiliating circumstance or another.  Of course, you would go on to pray, “But from the fear of being humiliated, deliver me, O Jesus.”

The prayer of Saint Francis is beautiful no matter your state in life. While St. Francis himself did not write the prayer, it reflects his spirituality, a spirituality beneficial to any leader.

Recall that earthly authority is bestowed.  But it is also temporal and fleeting. Rather than using one’s position for gain and conquering, St. Francis instead encourages us to see ourselves as conduits of God’s peace, love, light, and understanding.  A leader should use his or her influence for good.

Remember Mary Our Mother

And let us not neglect our Mother!  Both the Rosary and the Memorare are beautiful prayers for calling on Our Lady’s aid.

The Rosary instills a sense of groundedness in the details of daily life. Its mysteries recall births and deaths, joys and agony, and help us remember that Jesus and Mary were humans, too, and never tire of hearing our prayers. The unfailing Memorare is good for those critical moments when you just need help! The Blessed Mother will never let us down.

Saints who were leaders

The Catholic Church is full of emperors, kings and other leaders who became saints. Call on them. Ask them that through their intercession you, too, may become a saint.

St. Joan of Arc led an ordinary life in a French village until one day she heard the voice of God and several saints calling her to greatness. From there, she did the unthinkable.  She lead an army of men in the Hundred Years’ War.

CS Writer/Managing Editor Peter Darcy even wrote a recently released Kindle book on St. Joan that spells out her leadership virtues.

St. Louis IX, King of France, was known for his personal holiness and care for the poor.

St. Thomas More was a lawyer, statesman, councilor to the King of England, and a martyr for the faith. See additional lessons on leadership from St. Thomas More.

St. Wenceslaus, a Czech king, sought to maintain Christian values in the middle of widespread, dangerous political intrigue. He is a martyr.

St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta, while not a figure of elected or royal authority, was nonetheless a leader. She radically transformed how the world views poverty and devoted her life to serving the least among us, as Jesus himself would.

St. Thérèse of Lisieux is viewed as one of the most powerful saints of the 20th century despite not living long enough to serve in any recognizable leadership roles within her family or her Carmelite community. Her “little way” can teach us much about humility, and the importance of doing small things with love and greatness.

Pray for others

A good leader cannot afford to neglect prayer. It should be his or her first priority every morning. As is attributed to St. Francis de Sales, “Every one of us needs half an hour of prayer a day, except when we are busy – then we need an hour.”

One last important thing: leaders ought always to pray for those they lead. If you head a team, a mission, a family, a business, or any kind of organization where others depend on you—pray to our Father that you may be humble and wise enough to lead them. Pray for the virtues that will guide you and for forgiveness ahead of time should you make a mistake. And, last of all, thank God in your prayer for the opportunity to be of service to others.

Gifts from neighbors

Laura DeMaria

If you have been spending more time in your neighborhood these past few months, I wonder if you notice something like I do: people are friendlier. In the beginning it was because we truly had nowhere else to go, or anyone else to see, so to see another person - a stranger - across the street on the sidewalk was definitely grounds for a smile, a wave, and a hello.

Now people aren’t kind of so golden retriever about human-to-human interactions, but there is still a new sense of neighborliness that I a.) love, and b.) have personally benefited from. Twice this week.

The first time I was strolling about, as I do, mid-day. I love taking pictures, especially of flowers, and stopped to snap a few of some excellent, tall, wild-looking daisies in someone’s yard. As I stood there, trying to get the right angle, I realized the owner of the house was in the yard.

“Would you like one?” he asked.

I was thrilled and asked if I could have just one. He went behind the daisies and fished out a pair of clippers from among his tools and handed it to me.

“I planted them because my mother loved them, and they remind me of her,” he said.

When I got home, I took my single, bright pink daisy and put it in a wine bottle I had kept for just such a purpose. It has kept me company all week, beaming its beautiful face upward, gleaming in its water, creating reflections in the sun by the window.

The very next day I was strolling mid-day, as I do, coming back from noon Mass. I noticed a man rummaging through a little library I have passed many times (and from which I scooped out, earlier in the pandemic, many good Sarah Dessen novels). We said hello, and then he said, “Would you like a fig?” gesturing to the giant bush beside the books.

I stopped. I was astonished to have never noticed this particular fig tree, because I pass it all the time, and I am always on the lookout for figs. There is another one on the way to church that, sadly, never, ever has ripe figs (or else, the birds and squirrels get to them before me). Without fail, during the summer, I stop every time I pass and inspect it for edible fruit. So I was once again thrilled by the offer from a stranger, but a neighbor, who wanted to share.

He was an occupant of the house, evidently sorting out its library, and said a former housemate had planted the fig tree and they didn’t really know what to do with it. He said they hadn’t ever noticed it had ripe fruit before this year, either. He had tried one for the first time that week.

I reached up and pulled one down.

“What color would you call that?” he asked. “I am a bit color blind.”

I looked down at the fig. “Burgundy, I think.”

“Okay,” he said. “I will put up a sign that says the burgundy figs are edible.”

This afternoon, the sign is up.

The books, the sign, the fig tree.

We marveled at the abundance of red fruit hanging there, and speculated whether there was enough for pastry, how long it would keep once off the tree, and whether others would stop. He seemed hopeful they would.

I do have figs in my refrigerator, but they are in a plastic case and are store-bought. The couple I plucked from his tree do actually taste a little sour - maybe that is why the squirrels and birds have left them alone - and yet I know I will go back and get another. Part of that is the wonderful, earthy feeling of picking fruit: reaching up, gently pulling down the branch, feeling the fuzzy skin, taking that first crunchy bite into the flesh. Too much of my life is virtual now, and I enjoy this real-world life immensely.

The other part is that by visiting this tree and pulling down its fruit, I will remember this connection to another person who, simply out of generosity, offered me something. The novelty of that is somewhat due to the effects of isolation during the pandemic. But it is also because we are already an atomized society, and do not do “neighborly” things anymore. Interestingly enough, I feel more connected to my community - my immediate community, not the larger metro area - than I have in all the years I have lived here. It took a pandemic to make me notice my neighbors. Or, for us to notice each other.

"Staying Home" by Eileen Scofield

Laura DeMaria

“Staying Home” by L’Arche Greater Washington core family member Eileen Scofield

I received this image in the mail as part of L’Arche’s annual report. I was enchanted by it. It’s drawn by Eileen, Scofield, a core family member in the DC community, an avid artist and the organization’s chief friendship builder.

She named this drawing “Staying Home,” and I realized after a day that I initially looked at it incorrectly. But I like both interpretations.

The first is that you are looking into a single room where many people are socially distanced, in their boxes (whatever you would like the boxes to stand for). I thought of this at first because I know within the L’Arche homes now, everyone eats dinner at least 6 feet apart. So it kind of looked like that to me. And I was moved, generally, by the depiction of apartness, with each person in their square box. It feels like that, doesn’t it?

Then I realized this is actually a view of a tall building - say, an apartment building - with all its residents home. You see them in their windows. Notice they are smiling, as if they are still enjoying life and carrying on, despite. I liked that message, too. And I like how Eileen captured the fact that even though everyone is separate, they are still truly all together. I lose sight of this in my own day-to-day, when I focus just on how I am soldiering on. It is easy to forget that all those around me are doing the same, in quite close proximity.

One other nice thing to share: I truly enjoyed this video, A Day in the Life of Kelly and Alice, from Arlington’s Highland House community. Eating breakfast, going for a walk, running through the sprinkler, watching TV and playing games. Pandemic has taught me to enjoy these very simple things. Or maybe not to take them for granted.